TWO Prime Guidelines for Integrated Eroticism
There are two prime guidelines for integrated eroticism. First, it is not at the expense of the partner or the relationship. Second, there is a clear understanding that erotic fantasy is a totally different dimension than real life couple sexuality. Erotic fantasies and erotic materials function as a super-charged “sixth gear”—they provide a bridge to sexual desire or a bridge to orgasm. Confusing the role of erotic fantasy/materials and real life sexual behavior is the problem. Integrated eroticism promotes each partner having her unique erotic voice which reinforces couple sexuality. Integrated eroticism energizes couple sexuality. The core of integrated eroticism is to energize the couple bond, promote mystery and creativity, enjoy unpredictable and non-politically correct sexual scenarios, and provide vitality to the sexual relationship.
Integrated eroticism is a key factor in promoting orgasm and satisfaction. Eroticism has a unique role in resolving female orgasmic dysfunction, male ejaculatory inhibition, and premature ejaculation. Eroticism has a positive, integral role in individual and couple sexuality.
One of the most fascinating aspects of sexuality is the differences in what people find erotic. Have your clients try this exercise with their partner to create erotic scenarios and explore turn-ons.
DOWNLOAD: Creating Erotic Scenarios Worksheet
This post is an excerpt from the book Sex Made Simple, Clinical Strategies for Sexual Issues in Therapy by Barry McCarthy, PhD. McCarthy is a board-certified clinical psychologist, diplomat in sex therapy, certified marriage and family therapist, and a tenured professor of psychology at American University.
He has published 105 professional articles, 27 book chapters, and co-authored 15 trade books. Barry’s clinical expertise is in sexuality, especially issues of sexual desire, sexual function and dysfunction, relapse prevention, and prevention of sexual problems. He has presented over 350 workshops in the United States and internationally.
Barry W. McCarthy, PhD, ABPP, is a board certified clinical psychologist (ABPP), certified marital and sex therapist, and a tenured professor of psychology at American University. His clinical expertise focused on integrating sex therapy strategies and techniques into individual and couple therapy, assessment and treatment of the most common male and female sexual problems, and a special expertise in the treatment of sexual desire disorders.
Dr. McCarthy earned his BA from Loyola University and his MA and PhD from Southern Illinois University. His professional memberships include the American Psychological Association, American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy, Society for Sex Therapy and Research, and Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies. He is a Diplomate in sex therapy earning this from the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists.
As a leading expert in this field, Dr. McCarthy has presented over 350 workshops around the world, and his extensive list of publications includes over 100 professional articles, 26 book chapters, and co-authorship of 14 books, including Rekindling Desire (2nd edition), Sexual Awareness (5th edition), Enduring Desire, Discovering Your Couple Sexual Style, Men’s Sexual Health, Coping with Erectile Dysfunction, Getting It Right the First Time, and Coping with Premature Ejaculation.
Speaker Disclosures:
Financial: Dr. Barry McCarthy is a published author and receives royalties. He receives a speaking honorarium, book royalties, and recording royalties from PESI, Inc. He has no relevant financial relationships with ineligible organizations.
Non-financial: Dr. Barry McCarthy has no relevant non-financial relationships.
