- Conceptualizing codependence as loss of self in someone else
- Developmental sources of codependence
- Codependent behaviors vs. the label
- Identifying codependence – how codependent clients look in therapy
- Research, risks and treatment limitations
- Clinical dynamics to notice as you use your standard intake
- Using the Holyoake Codependency Index
- Relationship patterns/themes to look for
- Establishment of mutuality in treatment work
- Client goal setting
- Case Study: 24 year-old in a serious relationship with a dominating partner
Set the Stage to Shift Clients’ Focus from External to Internal
- Tools for educating the client about external vs. internal focus
- How to avoid becoming the client’s external source of direction
- Strategies to encourage self-empowerment from the very first session
- Addressing clinical challenges and codependence in self
- Case Study: Continue with 24 year-old feeling dominated by partner
Family of Origin and Parts Work to Help Clients Face Illusions and See the Realities
- Influences on self: Individual, family systems, and social/cultural
- Parts of self that emerged from family-of-origin experiences
- Visual tools to teach relationships between self and other(s)
- Gathering your clients’ trauma history
- Case Study: 50 year-old mother of an alcoholic adult son who chronically relapses
Enhance Codependent Clients’ Awareness of Body, Mind, Feelings and Thoughts
- Mindfulness techniques to increase awareness of body, mind and feelings
- Bottom-up grounding tools to notice self in the moment
- Cognitive strategies to increase awareness of thoughts
- Exercises to help clients be with their feelings in safe, manageable ways
- Tools clients can use to intervene on their own behalf
Build Self-Competence in Codependent Clients:
Strategies to Set Healthy Boundaries, Quiet Guilt, Manage Anxiety and More
- Addressing the grief of accepting the realities of self, others and situation
- Respond vs. react - present moment awareness to help clients tolerate frustration
- Mindful breathing techniques for anxiety management
- Set healthy boundaries with “I” statements
- Tools for quieting guilty thoughts
- Case Study: Continue with 50 year-old mother of relapsing adult son
Increasing Self-Empowerment and Self-Attunement:
Exercises and Practices That Show Clients They Can Count on Themselves
- Acceptance exercises that help clients let go of what they cannot control
- Show clients how to plan with self in mind
- Practice acting on goals
- Developing daily practices for self-awareness and self-responsiveness
- Returning to self as a secure base and an anchor in the storms and delights of life


